How the death of my friend’s saved my marriage
Susan attended a funeral service of her friend who lost her husband at Langata Cemetery.
Susan held her wailing friend strongly as the casket was lowered into the freshly dug grave.
Susan’s friend was screaming “My husband don’t leave me, please, don’t leave me!” as people looked on feeling sad for her.
The children were screaming too. Losing a father is not an easy thing.
If not for Susan, the friend would have thrown herself into the grave to be buried with her husband who died of suicide. Because, the husband found no meaning in life and he killed himself.
Susan remembered the many times the friend would say she is tired of her good for nothing husband and here she is screaming and feeling lost because the husband is no more.
As Susan watched the spectacle of broken hearts crying for a man who will never ever come back, Susan remembered her husband.
Susan remembered how much she takes her husband for granted.
How she talks to him like a small useless child however she pleases.
How she gives him prolonged silent treatment over issues they can easily resolve.
How she denied him s€x many times. And she asked herself “What if it was my husband that is buried today how would I feel?” Susan thought.
Susan remembered that she argued with her husband and he left the house with tension between them just because after all these years, he still leaves his plate in the living room instead of taking it to the sink after eating.
“God forbid that my husband die, but what if as my husband went out in anger and never returns and passes away, is this the last memory I would like my husband and I to have?” She thought again.
Susan began to remember all the wonderful things her husband has done in the past, which she never taught of before except complaining.
Now, in her heart, she began to appreciate him for all his efforts no matter how small it was.
At that moment, she realise her areas of improvement, and said to herself “there is no other man I would rather share my life with than my loving husband.”
She thought of life without him and it scared her. And said, “I would rather have disagreements with my loving husband than to lose him to death. I prefer his sense of humour and laughter than to cry for losing him.”
That evening, after Susan took her widowed friend to a safe place, she passed by at the supermarket and bought her husband a card saying “Thank you for being in my life”
And when she got home, she cooked her husband’s favourite meal and asked her children to join her in celebrating her husband.
That night, her husband came home expecting a fight from Susan, but instead, he got greeting and hugs from Susan and the children.
He was welcomed with songs, dancing and laughter, cute drawings of him with warm messages from the children, a home cooked meal, pleasant conversations. And Susan’s husband bust into tears when Susan and the children told him how much they love him and then surrounded him to pray for him.
A grown man cried like a baby because of love. He felt needed and he asked them “Is today father’s day?”
Susan looked into his eyes and said, “No, it is lovers day. Because, everyday is special with you around me from now on, we will do nothing but love each other.
I don’t know how long we have to live together, but it will not be wasted by fights, misunderstanding, complains and lack of appreciation.
In case you have forgotten, “I love you”
“I love you too” said Susan’s husband as he kissed and hugged Susan, the children dancing and cheering on.
Children long for a home where mom and dad give each other warmth.
Since then, both Susan and her husband have been a stronger and more loving couple after realizing that tomorrow is not guaranteed
~ Sometimes the death of someone wakes us up to the reality of life.
~ Don’t let the death of your spouse wake you up to the reality of life, it will be too late.
~ God forbid, if your spouse die today, will you regret how you have been treating him/her?
~ Do you think living alone without your spouse will be joyful to you?
~ Will you be able to transfer your children to another man or woman whom they have not grown to know?
~ If you decide to be a single father or mother, will you be able to do the job alone?
Can you stand the pain of your kids asking why they don’t have a father or mother like others?
~ What is it that you cannot mend in your marriage?
~ No doubt its not easy, but prayerfully love your spouse while he/she lives. It rubs on the children as well.
So mend your home, don’t destroy it.
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